Where is My Mind?

Matt in Nelson, BC

"Okey-dokey, smoky-wow how about the new perspective in the old friend of mine, Mr. ALTZ Heimer's?

How long we've been living together ALTZ– and how are we doing with our communication in our conversation and our getting to know each other?

I have to say I'm getting used to new slides and quakes and quills that take me sideways and back ways and simultaneously through wise or even unwise.

The other night I had a-what should I call it – a protracted psychotic night that I could not escape from.

I was sealed into an intangible and impossible series of psychic events that sent me on a roller coaster of fear that I could not jump off of – I was hurling at unimaginable speeds through time and space and trash and bogs and swamps – careening through memories, old stories, future events, and unimaginable outcomes.

I rode this dark wave faithfully for what felt like hours and eventually my mind ran out of gas – it was apocalyptic, dystopian, and deeply grotesque, and then, near the end – I went into a freefall like a falling star, heading toward oblivion, going faster into nothing and nothingness… I was lost. No mind, no body, just space.

I do believe I may be losing my mind.

And yet here I am. Where am I? – Am I?

I am.